Fourth and inches

In keeping with the title, today's post is related to games. And in keeping with the topic of games, today's post is being constructed with a particular rule in mind. Based upon an article about creative writing exercises, this rule is serving to make this post difficult to complete. However, the attempt must be made, if for no other reason than discipline.

With a collection of games numbering well into the hundreds, it is fair to say that games are a personal favorite. In keeping with the tone of the previous post, it seems that games have the capacity to at least approach the "transcendence" described earlier. By moving one "above and beyond" the material universe (given that, in the essence, all games take place in the imagination), it could be fairly said that games can allow one to "transcend". How many times have you played a game with family or friends, only to be shocked to discover that the hours have flown by?

Perhaps that sense of moving beyond the mundane is what makes games so appealing. The sense of experiencing things, even imaginarily (does the brain know the difference?) that one would never experience in "real life". The exploration of the unknown, and the thrill of discovery as another level is achieved, another card is turned, another battle is won.

Although, ironically, it is possible that another appeal of games is just the opposite: a sense of "knowing what the rules are". In a very literal sense, when playing a game, one is in control. You know what the rules are. You have a limited amount of information to process, and even unanticipated events that occur do so within the context of the game itself. (You're not surprised when your opponent cashes his cards in for reinforcements in a game of "Risk", for example, but you would be shocked to see him place a dinosaur on the board and proceed to play Godzilla all over your pieces...) Particularly if you have played a game before, you know what to expect.

The universe, however, imparts no such assurances to its players. :) Every day is a new roll of the dice, every moment brings with it the potential for a new, entirely unfamiliar rule. That may or may not ever be applied again. The universe offers an innumerable amount of opportunities and challenges to its players, but a sense of being in control is not one of them.

Anyway, games are cool. :) So, have you figured out the rule constraining the above paragraphs yet? Here's a hint - I just broke it. :)

Third eye

Falling into the "Notes" category (in that it is neither "gnat" nor "knot"), today's post has to do with spirituality, the paranormal, and other things that we lack the ability to see with our own two eyes.

I am very much of two minds when it comes to such things. On the one hand, I am fairly certain that the vast majority of "supernatural" experiences, if not all, can be explained in completely natural terms. The human brain is an incredibly complicated piece of kit, and we are only beginning to comprehend the things it can do, and how it is affected by its environment. And given that all of our perceptions of the world and its workings (natural and otherwise) are dependent upon the processes that take place in this poorly understood lump of tissue we all carry around on our shoulders, it is absolutely conceivable to me that the things that go bump in the night are, in the end, simply glitches in our internal software.

On the other hand, there is nothing that I would love more than concrete evidence that such experiences are real. The thought that the universe is "not only stranger than we imagine, but stranger than we can imagine" gives me great hope. The desire to push back the veil of reality and discover that it is just the barest of veneers covering what's really going on holds an amazing appeal for me.

My friend Tayo asked me a very difficult question one day. He asked me "David, what do you want?" (Actually I believe that is probably one of the most difficult questions you can ask anyone.) I thought about it for several weeks (truly!), and finally came back that what I wanted was for people to like me. Or, more to the point, I wanted people to not dislike me. (I never had a problem with people remaining neutral about me... :) )

But I was never really satisfied with that answer. And so, I have continued to cogitate on the question, some decade after it was originally asked. And though my answers continue to change as both I and my circumstances do, one aspect of my internal response has become fairly fixed: I want to experience transcendence.

If you look up "transcendence" in the dictionary (or, more likely in this day of Wikipedia and blogs, on dictionary.com...) you will find the definition is "the quality or state of being above and independent of the material universe". Sounds positively supernatural! :)

And I suppose that is why I have such a fascination with such potentially idiotic things as UFOs, Bigfoot, and life after death. Because if any of those things actually exist, then they do "transcend" what we understand as making up our material world.

However, there is an exquisite zen-like twist to this line of thinking. If any of those things were proved to actually exist, then they would instantly become part of our material universe, and so lose their transcendent quality! Reality is an elastic concept, and once something is "proven", reality adjusts itself quite comfortably to include the newborn "fact".

So maybe that is why I continue to enjoy the edges of the supernatural, without wanting to seek out the heart of any mysteries. Once the mystery is solved, it's no fun anymore. :)

Second thoughts

That title is accurate on several different levels. This is indeed my second posting of thoughts. And I have indeed been reconsidering this whole "blog" concept. (Interesting word "concept" - a mere one letter from "conceit"...)

I suppose this is kind of like karaoke (or anything else in life, really). As long as one does it with conviction, determination and a healthy willingness to laugh at oneself, who's to say it's wrong? I mean, how many times have you seen someone do something ridiculous, but you found yourself enjoying their antics, as idiotic as they may have been, simply because it was obvious that they were enjoying themselves?

I guess I hope that's what I'm going for here. Kind of like my dancing - what I lack in talent, I make up for with enthusiasm. :)

On another topic, I was thinking about writing this morning as I was driving to work. And not writing in the "let's construct some grand story and get it on paper" kind of writing. No, I was thinking about the simple, mechanical activity of recording one's thoughts in print. And the more I thought about it, the more awe-inspiringly magical it became.

Think about it - as you read this, you are privy to the very thoughts I am having as I write it. Possibly without you even knowing who I am, the simple act of writing them down has allowed me to project my thoughts to you across space and time. The way it has for all writers, since the first scribes put stylus to clay.

I was imagining trying to explain reading and writing to an illiterate barbarian who had never heard of such a thing. To him, I would think it would seem incredibly magical that something as simple as small marks on a piece of paper could enable us to read each others' thoughts. Hell, I'm only marginally barbaric, and it seems pretty impressive to me! :)

I suppose that feeling about the magical nature of writing is one of the reasons I have always enjoyed it. It's also why I have enough of a respect for it to make me wonder if I am doing it justice with this bit of fluff.

Words have power, and the act of writing them down deserves a great deal of respect. Don't believe me?

"The purple kangaroo, wearing a red hat and cape, rode his green bicycle through the window."

I just made you see a completely ludicrous scene in your head, simply by writing down (at least virtually) a string of small marks. If that's not power worthy of respecting, I don't know what is.

...

...

Of course, music is pretty powerful too, and anyone who has seen me dance (or karaoke!) can tell you how little respect I show for it! :)

So, in keeping with my introduction to this entry, I shall enthusiastically, if artlessly, press on with this. Hopefully you will find the fact that I am enjoying myself reason enough to join me.

First try

I blame my friend Don. (Of course, I blame my friend Don for a LOT of things, but I digress...) See, one of the coolest things that ever happened to me was meeting my friend Don. He is pretty amazing. He is an author, a teacher, an actor, a director, a father and, if I am reading his blog correctly (found here), some sort of raccoon wrangler. And that's part of the problem. He has accomplished so much that, once I met him, I felt positively inadequate. I mean, I had always wanted to do a lot of the things that he had already DONE. And so, with no disrepect to Don, I decided that, hell, if HE could do it, why couldn't I?

This line of thinking has led me into a number of odd, and strangely satisfying, circumstances. He has directed me in no less than 3 stage productions, he cast me in a movie, he helped me get cast in a webisode of "Stranger Things", he has shared his writings with me, and he has been gracious enough to return the favour by reading some of my own scratchings. All in all, it has been a very productive friendship, on top of the genuine affection we feel for each other. For me, at least. (Honestly, I'm still not sure what Don gets out of it...)

Which is all to say that when I learned that Don had started a blog, I had to check it out. And once I did, I realized that starting my own blog (something that I had been toying with for far too long) was as simple as filling in my Gmail account info. And so here I am.

So, if you find yourself bored, annoyed, insulted or indignant by anything I may write, you may join me in blaming my friend Don. If, however, you find yourself entertained, intrigued, delighted or tickled by anything you read here, you're welcome. Glad I could help. :)

(Actually, it's not fair to blame Don ENTIRELY for this. My wife got me started on Facebook, and that kind of added fuel to my "It might be kind of cool to start a blog" fire.)

So, here I am. You may be wondering about the title (and if not, bear with me...) - I kind of liked the variety of "n" sounds, with different spellings. Plus, I figured "Notes" applied to this overall blog, "Gnats" can describe the odd annoyance I may discuss here, and "Knots" points to certin "knotty" issues that I like to chew on occasionally.

I will confess to a certain continuing ambiguity about this whole "blog" concept. It has always seemed to me that the entire idea of having a running commentary online was, well, rather arrogant. I mean, honestly, who the hell CARES what I think, about anything? And certainly, among the vast impersonal hordes of the Internet, why should anyone presume that their voice is "worthy" of broadcasting.

However, I believe I can see a certain appeal. And in fact, it's Facebook that has given me the clue. See, I felt about "social networking" sites much the same way I felt about blogging - "What kind of arrogant jerk fills a website with info about themselves?" But then I got a Facebook page. And suddenly friends were commenting on things that I had said. Regardless of my own conviction of my basic lack of importance in the overall scheme of things, people were actually reading what I had written, and even better, acknowledging what I had written.

Bingo! Suddenly the appeal of blogs, and Facebook, became crystal clear. It's not a matter of "Hey! Listen to me! It's important that you hear about what kind of breakfast cereal I ate this morning!" In fact, I wouldn't be at all surprised to learn that most bloggers are convinced their writing is unimportant drivel (this blog being an excellent example!). However, because they are willing to throw their drivel up on that drive-in screen that is the Internet, they open themselves up to feedback. Good, bad, indifferent, I'm not sure it matters. What matters is the knowledge that "Hey! I'm not alone out here! Somebody noticed me and my thoughts!" Which, I suppose, reflects their (my) insecurities as much as my previous theory reflected their (my) arrogance. (And even though I am convinced insecurity and arrogance are two sides of the same coin, that's a topic for another blog...)

So, welcome! I hope you enjoy what you find here. And more importantly, I hope you'll say hi. It can get lonely out here on the Information Superhighway. :)